International Segment: Recommends Humsafar! Episode # 8 update - “For a simple four letter word, ‘Love’ has too many connotations”

"When my father died, I moved into the space he left inside me and found out it was where I belonged” ~ Farland Fish

The death of a father is a life-altering moment especially for a man. He is forced to grow up in that very moment and fill his father's shoes taking over the responsibility of the well-being of his loved ones leaving precious little time to grieve the loss of the only man he has ever aspired to emulate in life.

This episode begins on a somber note with Ashar losing his father, Baseerat within the confines of the hospital where he is being treated. Baseerat, as though he knew of his imminent death, confides in his son about his concern for Khirad's welfare due to her innocence and simplicity. The words uttered by him regarding Khirad's lack of knowledge of the ways of the world and how he fears people taking undue advantage of her simplicity and trusting nature sounds ominous considering what follows in the episode.

Khirad goes to college to pursue her higher studies in Mathematics where she meets Sara's cousin, Khizer, who is enchanted with her from the very moment he sets eyes on her. The dynamics within the relationship between Ashar and Khirad gradually shifts and changes with these two events - Her singular focus on studies and the presence of Khizer!

In a way, this episode sets a serious tone for the rest of the story to follow.

Different shades of love

Love is definitely not as simple as it sounds. It is a beautiful feeling as long as it is untouched by emotions that can push you to act in a manner that is hurtful to your loved one. Add external factors, and it gets all the more difficult to hold on to the purity of that feeling. Understanding the various shades of love is as important in a relationship as loving itself is.

Passionate and Powerful 

“Main eh university apne liye nahi ja rahi, Ashar keliye jana chahti hoon. Main janti hoon woh mujhse mohabbat karte hain,
Lekin ab dil chahta hai ke woh mujhpe fakr bhi Karen.”

Love can be empowering to those who believe in its power. Khirad wants to step up and be worthy of not only Ashar's love but also his respect. She decides to pursue her higher studies in order to stand tall beside her husband with her head held high and even more so for her husband to stand taller because of her. Her passion for her husband reflects in her passionate approach to her studies and her need to excel at whatever she does.

BUT does Khirad realize that in her passion to prove herself worthy of her beloved, she may be paying a little less attention to her husband's needs?

Laughter and Playfulness 

“Achi tarah dil lagake padna, baki bachchon se nahi ladna, lunch time se khana hai, okay?”

A relationship that thrives on laughing together has a better success rate than those that don't. Ashar's playfulness is evident in scenes where he sweetly mock instructs Khirad to behave like a good kid without getting into fights with the other kids as he drops her off at her college.

His attempt at keeping it light can also be seen when he tries to divert her attention from studies to himself by grabbing her books and sweetly requesting her to spend time with him.

Rangmunch cutest moment of the episode has to be the scene where Ashar comes back home in the dead of the night to find Khirad fast asleep. The way he tries to wake her up is playful at the same time reveals his craving to be with his wife the moment he comes back home.

Innocence and Trust

“Ashar, Khirad ka khyaal rakhna. Woh bahut sada hai. Bahut masoom hai. Use zindagi ke bare mein kuch nahi pata”

Khirad is portrayed as someone who is innocent and trusting. She probably does not yet realize Khizer's intentions in constantly seeking her guidance in studies or the reasoning behind his choice of words while praising her in front of Ashar.

Her innocence and trust in all things good may soon be put to test when circumstances prove to be stronger than her inherent goodness.

Protectiveness and Concern

“Mujhe darr hai ki koi uski saadagi ka najayaz fayada na uta len. Maine apni marti hui behen ko wada kiya tha ki mera beta uski beti ko khush rakhega.”

The most important ingredient in any relationship based on love is the wish to protect the ones you love from harm. Baseerat's love for his son, his niece, and his sister comes through loud and clear in his words to his son just before his death. An honorable man who stood by his dying sister and kept his word till his last breath that he would protect her daughter, will be sorely missed by us all.

In the face of the events that follow, it will be interesting to see how far Ashar remembers and makes an effort to keep his father's words and dying wish at heart.

Jealousy and Suspicion (Precap of Episode # 9)

These are undoubtedly the perfect 'deal breakers' of a relationship. This is that facet of love you never want to encounter. Entry of Khizer with his intent to cause disruption in their lives has opened up the door to this deadly duo in the mind of Ashar. But, the question is, Is Khizer the only reason for Ashar's growing insecurity, jealousy, and suspicion?

I think not! I leave the discussion open on what you think those other factors are that has made a gentleman like Ashar suddenly feel insecure about his relationship with his beloved innocent wife Khirad and has let petty emotions like jealousy and suspicion take over his heart and mind.

You can find the links for this episode @

More on Humsafar @

Neeraja Unni


  1. Hasn't Ashar behaved like an insecure man from the beginning of the marriage? He is not sure if it was the right thing to do and then he was forced into it. Everytime Khirad speaks with her mamu, or she is sending off an email, Ashar has a need to ask" are you writing bad things about me?". There is an insecurity within himself that he is projecting onto her. When (not if) this marriage falls apart, it will be because of his insecurities. You cannot profess deep and undying love and let something as petty as jealousy come between you.

  2. ****spoiler alert****
    I acctually totally agree with Ayisha above BUT in the novel (sorry if it might be a spoiler), ashar is actually never insecure about khirad's love. in the beginning, ashar tolerates khizar well. but after a while, the orchestered drama created by khizar & sara begins and they say tiny insignificant things, creating insecurity and doubtfulness in ashars mind (and most of the things are said when khirad is not present or even if she is present, she doesn’t thinks much of them ).
    what follows after that is what you should watch in the drama. they trap khirad soo well that ashar finds no excuse for her and all those tiny insignificant things become a atomic explosion.

    the question then remains to why khirad doesn't catches up to all this nonsense? in the novel it is explained really well that khirad never thinks much about kizhar other then a classmate for the following reasons:
    when khirad joins university, khizar is her classmate and she knows already that he is saras cousin. After a while Khizar starts approaching her more and more for assignments and lectures. Khirad beleives he has no interest whatsoever in her (other then asking for her assignments and lectures), because

    1) she is already married and everyone is aware of that
    2) khizar has already told his long love tale about this girl, whose parents are unwilling to get him married to her to the little group depicted in the drama. two of the boys shown in the group are already engaged or committed. the group always is coming up with theories and ways to help him talk to the girls parents.
    3) Khirad only tolerates him because he is fareedas relative.
    4) she doesnt thinks of khizar as anything more because he is over ambitious about what he wants in life, and is much younger and she even thinks he is immature. In the novel khizars ambitions are to study in USA (but his family is less financially off and cannot afford his tuition fees in states).

    unfortunetly, as much as i can understand that they cannot depict everything from the novel in the drama (even though the drama is doing a wonderful job), they need to mention all these characteristics about khizar to explain why khirad never thinks much of him past a classfellow.


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